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I’m grappling with how to think and feel about this grand gesture. How do you suggest I respond?. DEAR CLUELESS: If he’s looking to you to free him of his pain, then he’s not paying close enough attention in AA. Asking you to help him — via phone, FaceTime or interpretive dance — isn’t making amends. It’s an attempt to outsource his emotional work to you. It’s important for the health of both of you to decline that assignment. Be kind, of course, but don’t be available to him in this way.

So respond as if he were actually making amends: Say, by reply email, that you accept his apology, forgive him, and wish him the best in his recovery, Gentle, brief, goodbye, DEAR CAROLYN: I am the mother of two very young children, The elder child looks just like me, with dark hair, dark eyes and olive skin, and the other is the polar opposite — blond hair and blue eyes, People will approach me in the street to comment on how different they look, and ask where my gaynor minden pointe shoes sizing younger child’s coloring came from, I start going into chapter and verse about my mother’s blue eyes and my husband being blond as a child, and that answer never seems to satisfy them..

This baffles me, but even more baffling is why I feel the need to explain my family’s genetics to perfect strangers. I don’t want my children to think this is a big or important issue. Could you suggest a polite but unresponsive response to this question?. DEAR BAFFLED: You can make this question go away in no words (death stare); one word (“Really?”); two words (“Genetic quirks”); or the smartassery of your choice. I’m not baffled by reflexive overexplaining. It’s tough to disentangle overt questions on a child’s coloring from covert questions on a child’s parentage, and it’s pretty much impossible to ignore the dated and inappropriate but persistent tinge of scorn that comes with parentage questions.

And even a whiff of judginess about their children can poke Mama Bears hard, Even without that subtext, too, the fact of being nosey-parkered over and over and over and over and over on the same topic is a provocation unto itself, So while I hear regularly from people who don’t endorse (with apologies to Mad Magazine) the snappy-answers-to-stupid-questions approach to gaynor minden pointe shoes sizing dismissing busybodies, I’m all for it, It’s your life, your business, and others’ boundary blindness — so you have every right to streamline this nuisance away, In snarky words, few words, or none..

Caldwell Gallery: “Where Tradition Meets Innovation,” award-winning quilts from the Creative Home Arts Department at the San Mateo County Fair. Through Jan. 4. Caldwell Gallery, 400 County Center at the Hall of Justice, Redwood City. http://cmo.smcgov.org/arts-commission. Cantor Arts Center: “The Crown under the Hammer: Russia, Romanovs, Revolution,”  through March 4 (also at Hoover Institution). “Rodin: The Shock of the Modern Body.” Open ended. Three galleries including nearly 100 Rodin sculptures; includes comparative works by his rivals, mentors, admirers and imitators. Cantor Arts Center, 328 Lomita Drive, Stanford. https://museum.stanford.edu/.

Community School of Music and Arts: “Picture This,” student exhibition, Dec, 9 through Jan, 18; reception 3-5 p.m, Dec, 9, Mohr Gallery, Community School of Music and Arts, Finn Center, 230 San Antonio Circle, Mountain View, Free, http://www.arts4all.org or 650-917-6800, ext, 305, Cubberley Artist Studio Program: “Guided Colors,” K-8 exhibition, gaynor minden pointe shoes sizing Dec, 10 through Dec, 15; reception 3-5:30 p.m, Dec, 10, ArtLab Gallery, Cubberley Community Center, 4000 Middlefield Road, Palo Alto, http://www.cityofpaloalto.org/casp..

Pace Gallery: Adam Pendleton, “Which We Can,” through Dec. 22. Pace Gallery, 229 Hamilton Ave., Palo Alto. http://www.pacegallery.com/. Palo Alto Art Center: Tropical Holiday Family Day, 2-4 p.m. Dec. 10; artmaking projects, storytelling, live music; free. Florence Robichon’s “A Brighter Future: Creativity and Learning in a Syrian Refugee Camp in Iraqi Kurdistan,” through Jan. 3. “Through That Which Is Seen,” various artists, Jan. 20 through April 8. Palo Alto Art Center, 1313 Newell Road, Palo Alto. https://www.paacf.org/.

Guillermo del Toro’s “The Shape of Water” may not boast the century’s weirdest sci-fi movie coupling, That honor probably goes to the 2016 Mexican movie “The Untamed” (if you haven’t seen it, seek it out), But del Toro’s vision of human/fantastic-creature sex is likely to be the most romantic ever filmed, By the time Sally Hawkins’ mute heroine, Elisa Esposito, gets the gilled-and-gorgeous, unnamed fish man — played by del Toro’s regular monster mimer, Doug Jones — alone in her flooding bathroom, their need for gaynor minden pointe shoes sizing each for could not be more palpable, (Elisa’s association of erotic pleasure with water is carefully set up from early in the film.)..



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