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DEAR AMY: I’d like to offer a note of support for your answer to “No Sex in the Country,” the letter from a woman who did not want to have a sexual relationship with her male friend, who continued to pressure her. I wonder if men understand how trapped women feel when they are persistently pressured for sex. It’s a deal breaker, for sure. DEAR BEEN THERE: I completely agree. You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or “like” her on Facebook.

MAUI — No visit to Maui is complete without experiencing a luau, sipping a mai tai at sunset as you enjoy the graceful hula and a glimpse of the roast pig as it’s unearthed from the underground oven, Most luaus last about three hours and will run you $100 or more, but no two luaus are exactly the same when it comes to food and entertainment, Some feature traditional Hawaiian buffets, classic dances and historical narration, Others delve deep into the unique cultures and do pointe shoes hurt cuisines of Pacific islands in addition to Hawaii, from Tahiti and Samoa to New Zealand..

Here are three great luaus to try. Long recognized as Maui’s top luau, Old Lahaina offers a good introduction to the food, history, and hospitality of the islands. The venue is breathtaking: flickering tiki torches, coconut trees, a watercolor sunset. Whether you choose to sit on traditional mats or at conventional tables, you’ll have great views of the grass-mound stage and the ocean beyond. The all-you-can-eat buffet features average examples of Hawaiian staples including lau lau, taro leaf-wrapped pork, chicken long rice, ahi poke and poi. And the premium open bar is stocked with everything from Old Lahaina Dark Rum to Maui Brewing Co. seasonal beers. Get your drinks before the show starts. The lines can get pretty long.

At sunset, the entertainment begins, The performers are stunning and highly skilled, moving seamlessly between elaborate costume changes, The do pointe shoes hurt show does a lovely job of illustrating the early Polynesian migration across the islands, though some parts — the soulful chanting, for example, during the kahiko, the ancient style of hula — are more exciting than others, such as the history lesson and buttoned-up costumes depicting the arrival of missionaries on the islands, What stands out: The service, Our server went above and beyond, taking drink orders so we didn’t have to stand in line, and bringing us extras of the tasty appetizer, house-made taro hummus and chips..

Details: $119 for adults and teens; $78 for children 12 and younger. 1251 Front St., Lahaina; www.oldlahainaluau.com. Maui’s longest-running luau may also be its sexiest. Drums of the Pacific takes place in an outdoor amphitheater at the Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa on Kaanapali Beach. As soon as you hear the beat of the drums and the sound of the conch shell, know you’re in for a wild ride. Produced by High Chief Papaliitele Tihati Thompson, the show features authentic dances and music from seven different Pacific islands, and the contrasts are pretty fascinating. There’s the lovely hands and subtle eyes of old Hawaii hula, the pulsating drum dances of Tahiti and the electrifying Samoan fire-dancing and flame-eating that still linger in your mind three months later. That said, we could’ve done without the requisite hula lesson and Hawaiian fashion show.

Drums of the Pacific has an open bar and traditional all-you-can-eat buffet and dessert bar, but with do pointe shoes hurt a few contemporary standouts including, on our visit, macadamia nut-encrusted white fish and a soba noodle salad, Our kiddo appreciated the chicken nuggets and penne marinara options, What stands out: The festival dances of the Maori people of New Zealand, Wildly-painted faces, protruding tongues, sweaty men thrusting spears, Awesome, Also, top-notch vocal solos throughout the show, Details: $119 for adults and teens; $74 for children ages 6 to 12, Hyatt Regency Maui Resort and Spa, 200 Nohea Kai Drive, Lahaina; http://drumsofthepacificmaui.com..

What happens when you combine the service and entertainment know-how of Old Lahaina Luau with the farm-to-table culinary prowess of Maui’s recently-renovated Pacific’O Restaurant? You get Feast at Lele, a five-course, beachfront dinner and luau that uses modern versions of traditional dishes to tell the story of the Pacific islands. This a gourmet, table-clothed luau dinner aimed at adult foodies. It’s actually more like a fine-dining restaurant experience — with an exotic show pitched right in the soft, West Maui sand.

Related ArticlesSouthwest begins $49 each way sale from Oakland to HawaiiSouthwest Airlines will soon offer flights from Bay Area to Hawaii do pointe shoes hurt Each of executive chef Adrian Aina’s courses are accompanied by performances from that island, So you’ll be eating five-hour braised beef in a kiwi jus during the athletic dances of New Zealand, and sous-vide salmon (an update on lomi lomi) with pickled onions and kalo puree during the hip-swaying Hawaiian hula, Another bonus: Every party gets its own private table..



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